Progress of a Nation - the flip-side.

We are a great people who have built the tallest towers, biggest, longest, flashiest this & that, sent a man to everest, the north pole, space and what not (never mind that it was all by proxy), but cannot seem to live without making asses of ourselves in the eyes of the world. We seem to be obsessed with keeping up appearances of affluence, while wallowing in muck.

We are a unique kind of people - yes I include myself in this special category of mankind ..... mea culpa.

The economy is in tatters, crime at epidemic proportions, health in the pits, security forces apparently feuding, judiciary - disgraced, criminals - awarded, politicians incapable of debate, media - the powerful politician's footstool, education - substandard, and a leadership that wouldn't welcome challenges. All these, while we have catchy phrased campaigns of a Glokal, cemerlang, gemilang, terbilang and "spaced-out" (angkasakan bangsa) race - all C4-ed into oblivion, when one looks beneath the shiny surface. And yet we promote personality cults, for politicians.

As if to illustrate this state of denial, some, have made bold statements in the international media that amounted to - “we need to improve, but don't need to change the system” - that was indeed quite amusing, to say the least. Will Durant once said, "Education is the progressive discovery of our ignorance" - no, not for these guys - they are our elite!

Gone are the days when we embraced values deemed "western" – free debate, free media, free enterprise, competition, accountability, economic sustainability and succession planning- that would've actually made this nation an economic powerhouse that it should have been; if nothing else, simply by virtue of its strategic location on the world map.

People tend to seek simplistic solutions to complex problems when they are devoid of ideas , intellect and reason. It is through the suppression of critical thought that dictators perpetuate their rule. The lack of intellectual philosophical insight into social maladies that plague our nation, render us vulnerable to exploitation and would lead to our fall.

It happens when a people indulge themselves in the delusion of grandeur, that all is well. It happens when a leadership is so consumed by its own "greatness", that it boasts and gloats even of its shortcomings. Any attempt towards reason is perceived as anti-establishment. Faults and ills are “glossed over” in the interest of "maintaining social order".

Such is the extent of philosophical and intellectual bankruptcy that we are faced with. Most, if not all leaders that we have, would sell-out their convictions with the blink of an eye, should it justify the desire to "make a living". As TDM once quoted - “Every man has his price”. Gone are the ideals of the nation's forefathers, that shaped the nation. Greed has become the sin that most of us indulge in today - a sin that is actually perpetuated by the leaders of today. This is "our way", today.

Greed and selfishness have always been used by the powerful, as a weapon to control others. Today, it is used on the ignorant rakyat and those entrusted by the people to preserve our independence and freedom. We as a people have sacrificed our freedom at the altar of economic gains, which doesn't necessarily translate into progress. We often readily sell our souls for material gain due to greed, which is today part of our culture. We have become sitting ducks to the political elite, who strive to increase their control over our daily lives.

These sins of greed and covetousness have become part of all of us - some have embraced it more than others. Malaysians would sell their souls for freebies and "favours". It is a deadly disease that has been inflicted upon certain "leaders" and people alike, via policies that actually cater to the powerful elite in society. The masses swallow the political spins in a drunken stupor, oblivious to their enslavement in the hustle and bustle of “modern lifestyle”.

So easily appeased is the average Malaysian, that they prefer to be blind to the truth, for the sake of “saving face”, comforts, pride, allegiance to authority, social order, "making a living" and maybe for a plate of "nasi goreng" or KFC. Incidently, all these things are apparently essential components to the much touted "Asian Values" ....

That is how cheap we have become.

We are a nation full of people who are sick to the bone, due to the addiction to instant gratification and symptomatic solutions. We are therefore a nation of appeasers, and not fighters. We are a nation enslaved by delusions of grandeur and persecution.

We are not just socio-politically ill, morally decadent, spiritually lost and philosophically bankrupt - we even have among the highest rates of physical illnesses, as a result of lifestyles encouraged by the "leaders".

We are today, a people so disillusioned by our lives, that we just seek short cuts to escape from it. We scramble for anything that provides that elusive "peace of mind", so that we get those moments of refuge- to escape from the problems that plague us. Religion, vice, luxury, drugs or any of the seven deadly sins become “fair game”. We are a people clamoring for hope and direction, in a nation with a new culture devoid of reason. Having lost control of our lives we beg to be controlled, by the luxuries and pleasures we deem necessary. We gawk in fascination at the shine of the cage built around us, unaware of our emasculation and imprisonment.

It remains to be seen if our leadership has the will to snap out of this “syndrome of denial”. Or else, in due time, by 2057, as a result of the NEP, sooner or later, natural selection will play its role. A sick nation cannot preserve its independence, and identity.

"Asian Values" 101

At the time the term "Asian values" began to appear in the mass media, the scholar de Bary, who has spent more than 50 years studying Asian civilizations (including China, Japan, Korea, and India) was asked "What are Asian values?", he did not know how to answer. He has never heard of this term. It was not in the literature. Asians were not conscious that they have such common values in the past. It is highly likely that such Asian values are political constructions. (de Bary 1998: p. 1)
-The Alleged Asian Values and Their Implications for Bioethics
- Kam-por Yu, Ph.D.
The Hong Kong Polytechnic University

With the above, allow me to begin by saying that the idea of "Asian Values" is nothing but Hogwash - a political spin articulated by authoritarian regimes of the third-world nations, to legitimize and strengthen their grip on power. They use this excuse also disguised as Confucianism, Family values, Islamic Laws, Morality and many more.

At the heart of this argument lies one undeniable "asian value" - hypocrisy! It is this undoubtedly Asian value that is used every so often to perpetuate a make believe orderly society, where-in the problems of the day is often swept under the carpet to "save face" (which by the way, is an Asian value).
Corruption, rape incest, cronyism, theft, murder, apostasy, honor and in fact almost anything and everything that is evil is tolerated to "save face" on the part of the one in a position of power - not the victim who is supposed to be protected.

It was an excuse for despots to thumb their noses at the "west", with their economic gains in the last 30yrs or so, despite the absence of real freedom in these countries, that "boasted" an apparently hard working, disciplined, politically docile and subservient "social order".

When there is opposition or expression of discontent in public, the people are frowned upon by authorities that claim that "It is not our way of doing things .... we prefer 'polite negotiated settlements' .... " which in actuality means "arbitration/ bribery behind closed doors". By doing so, leaders of dissent are often "bought out" or "blackmailed" into submission to authorities who ultimately seek to perpetuate the rule.

Leaders who espouse "Asian Values" often say, "we have laws by which the people have to abide" - sure, we should!
Provided the laws are just and not manipulated to the advantage of oppressors.
To say that concerns of society takes precedence over the individual in all cases, is very much a "misguided" statement or policy, for it is individuals that have brought out these ideas of "Asian Values" and have convinced society as a whole.

It should be brought to light that these very proponents of "asian values", often quickly abandon these principles when they are faced with economic gain via competition, but backtrack when it comes to politics and freedom.

Free and healthy debate of opinions and ideas is as much a value that should be preserved as are filial piety and respect for authority. So are freedom of speech and media.

I was quite perplexed to say the least, on hearing the differences in opinion between En. Nazri and En. Khairy on 101 East (Al-Jazeera) last night- While En. Nazri says that the system has worked for fifty years and doesn't need an "overhaul", En. Khairy (despite being the apologist) says that it works but has room for improvement!

It appeared that En. Khairy at least isn't as blind to the truths and has chosen to play both sides of the fence.
By saying that the media should be able to "regulate itself", instead of being regulated by the government in due time, while En. Nazri comes out boldly to say that the press is free to write what they wish, could En Khairy have unwittingly exposed the "lie of a free press in Malaysia"?
Or was it done on purpose to illustrate the difference of opinion within the hierarchy? Could there be a shift in the policies, given the western influences in En Khairy? Could he have been "restrained" on the international stage by his alma mater?
And I wonder if he thought of postal votes while bragging about the "teasing-off" of ghosts on the electoral rolls and indelible ink ...........

While En. Nazri was gloating about the "democratic rule of the Majority", was he aware that the true test of a democracy lies in taking care of minority rights? Did he think that the system that he represents is perfection manifested, that he believes that it couldn't be changed or improved on? Hasn't he heard that the only thing that he cannot change is "change" itself and that is the only way to progress?

Come what may, it would be prudent for all Asians to bear in mind that there has been no social system or order that is infallible in the face of human evolution.

It is very much an "Asian Value", Islamic value, Confucian Value and a democratic too to seek justice.
To that end, individuality and an expression of dissent is very much an "Asian Value".

I follow up the above with quotes from a few essays. I have decided against publishing my work on this topic, as it would be tiresome to most. The links I promised, have all got mixed-up - so I apologize for not providing them (Just google "asian values" and you'll find them).

Thank you.



"While we accord high priority to social and economic rights, we must at the same time guard ourselves from stretching the argument too far. Development cannot be used as an apology for authoritarianism. The fact of the matter is that more nations have been impoverished by authoritarianism than enriched by it. By not giving vent to the vices of dissent, wrongs cannot be made right and remedies for failures cannot be made available," said Anwar.

"Thus the notion that freedom must be sacrificed on the altar of development must be rejected. It is our conviction that only through the ability of every individual, however weak or disadvantaged, to freely articulate his fears and grievances can we hope to bring about a just and caring society. Only by guaranteeing the individual's right to participate fully in society's decision-making processes can we confer legitimacy to political leadership and governance, for government derives their just powers from the consent of the governed."
- Anwar Ibrahim,University of the Philippines Law Centre's Institute of Human Rights,1994

"However, as an Asian observer noted: ''When I first came across Lee's list of supposed Asian values, I saw values that were not so much specific to Asian culture but good British upper class Tory values dear to threatened elites everywhere." It was not without good reason that one British cabinet minister once referred to Lee, when he still was known as Harry Lee, as the ''best bloody Englishman east of Suez".

Not to be outdone by Lee is Malaysian Prime Minister Mahathir Mohamad, who combined an attractive Third World critique of Western economic domination with a strident equation of liberal democracy with anarchy and Western imperialism. The classic is Mahathir's statement in this regard with his speech at the United Nations in 1991, in which he asserted:

''If democracy means to carry guns, to flaunt homosexuality, to disregard the institutions of marriage, to disrupt and damage the well-being of the community in the name of individual rights, to destroy a particular faith, to have privileged institutions [ie the Western press] which are sacrosanct even if they indulge in lies and instigations which undermine society, the economy, and international relations; to permit foreigners to break national laws; if they are the essential details, can't the news converts opt to reject them? Hegemony by democratic powers is no less oppressive than hegemony by totalitarian states.""
- THI LAM (Pacific News Service), THE NOTION OF "ASIAN VALUES" IS A MYTH

"In light of the severe recession that has gripped Asia in 1997-98, the collapse of the paternalistic Asian authoritarian government in Indonesia, and political instability in Malaysia itself, these arguments now ring hollow, and it is safe to say that "Asian values" have not figured prominently in the analysis and interpretation of the crisis. Lee Kwan Yew has publicly backed away from some of his earlier assertions, and many observers now claim that that Asian values, far from explaining Asia's economic success, lie at the root of the cronyism and corruption afflicting countries there." - Francis Fukuyama, ICAS Fall Symposium, Asia'sChallenges Ahead, University of Pennsylvania, September 29, 1998

Blogging debate - Al-Jazeera, 101 East

Thinking About Human Rights and Asian Values

(Note: I'm currently at work trying to verify my opinions that Asian Values is nothing but a political spin for "Asian Despotism" also called "Oriental Despotism" - the chief proponents of which were Tun Dr. Mahathir and Mr. Lee Kuan Yew. There is another essay, wherein Mr. Sen specifically points out LKY's (and Li Peng's) ignorance of facts.
This is the first in the series that I publish as an introduction to the topic. Further readings will be given as links, when I write my piece in a couple of days. Thank You)

Human Rights Dialogue 1.4 (Spring 1996): "Three Years After The Bangkok Declaration"

Amartya Sen

While it might not be clear what "Asian values" are, they seem to have gained a place in the standard analysis of contemporary events. In a provocative essay, entitled "Japan's Nice New Nationalism," published in 1995, the Economist poses a question in a rather stark form—a query that has often been stated, albeit less clearly: "Is the combination of nationalist confidence and a growing economic interest in Asia likely to pose a threat?"*2* The threat referred to relates to the concerns of the Western countries. The reference here is not only to—not even primarily to—Japan's dominance in trade and world markets, but to Japan's possible role in tolerating and supporting some policies and practices in Asia that may be quite unacceptable in the West. The Economist identifies "human rights and press freedoms" as "the most frequent battlegrounds."

This way of seeing the "clash of cultures" is increasingly prevalent now. But to see the conflict over human rights as a battle between Western liberalism on one side and Asian reluctance on the other is to cast the debate in a form that distracts attention from the central issues, which concern Asia itself. In the battle over the role of human rights and such matters as press freedom (a battle that is certainly forceful in contemporary Asia), the primary parties are Asians of different interests and convictions, even if occasionally a visiting American might get caned in an Asian country. This is not to deny that America or Europe has legitimate reasons to worry about the outcome of this and related contentions about ideas and politics in Asia (I have nothing against the Economist posing this "Western" question—one of some interest to its readers), but this dispute over principles and practice is really about the lives of Asians—their beliefs and traditions, their rules and regulations, their achievements and failures, and ultimately their lives and freedoms. The Western concern—legitimate on its own—may even contribute to misspecifying the central features of the debate.

There is a further reason for removing this debate from the perspective of Western anxiety about Asian practice. That often-invoked perspective gives the immediate impression that the primacy of human rights is a fundamental and ancient feature of Western culture, and one not to be found in Asia. It is, as it were, a contrast between the authoritarianism allegedly implicit in, say, Confucianism vis-à-vis the respect for individual liberty allegedly deeply rooted in Western culture. There are good historical reasons to doubt each of the two claims implicit in the contrast. As to when the notion of individual liberty first became explicit in the West, Isaiah Berlin has noted: "I have found no convincing evidence of any clear formulation of it in the ancient world."*3* And insofar as we do find arguments championing freedoms in some generic sense in ancient Greek treatises (as we clearly do, for example, in Aristotle's Politics and also in Nicomachean Ethics), it is not hard to discover comparable championing of generically described freedoms and tolerance in the writings of many Asian theorists, such as Ashoka, whose inscriptions from the third century b.c. emphasize tolerance and liberty as central values of a good society. Indeed, the rhetoric of freedom is abundantly invoked in many of the Asian literatures. Buddha even explains nirvana in the language of "freedom," to wit, the freedom from the miseries of life. If there is a real gap today in the acceptance of freedom and liberty in the West vis-à-vis those in Asia, the roots of a hard division lie much closer to our times.

Nor is it helpful to see the contrast in terms of the practical traditions of "Oriental despotism" that had once so fascinated European scholars in the heyday of the historial emergence of democratic commitments of the West. If the despots of the Orient were more despotic than those in the West (it is not obvious that this was the case), the political limits of today's Asia are not clearly bound by those traditions—not any more than the political possibilities in Europe are confined by the heritage of the Spanish Inquisition or the history of Nazi genocide.

Many Western commentators find it deeply unacceptable that some people who argue against human rights in Asia try to gain inspiration from specific interpretations of "Asian values." This is an understandable concern, but that search for inspiration is a close cousin of the tendency in the West to see ideas of democracy and liberty specifically in terms of "Western" traditions. Even the language used in recommending to Asia what is called "Western democracy" imposes a geographical mode of divisiveness that springs not only from Asian intransigence but also from Western "priority complex." If the grabbing of "Asian values" by the champions of authoritarianism has to be effectively and fairly questioned, what is needed is not the claim—often implicit—of the superiority of what are taken as Western values, but a broader historical study of Sanskrit, Pali, Chinese, Arabic, and other Asian literatures (in relation to corresponding writings in the Western classics). And nearer our times, acknowledgment would have to be made to the contributions of national leaders such as Mahatma Gandhi or Dr. Sun Yat-sen, who were, already a hundred years ago, cogently vocal in defense of the widest forms of democracy and political and civil rights.

I am not, of course, disputing that at a truly deep level, cultural comparisons based on real history could be extremely interesting in diagnosing the balance of focal concerns in different regional traditions in the world and in dealing with the principles and reasonings that have a bearing on the contemporary formulations of human rights. But neither the rapid invoking of "Asian values" in defense of suppressing human rights, nor the expression of Western anxiety and consternation about "Asian" ways, helps to advance critical scrutiny of the role of human rights and their consequences in Asian societies. The subject has a contingently regional dimension, but it is not a foundationally regional issue.

*1* This is an excerpt of a paper entitled "Human Rights and Economic Achievements," presented at the Hakone Workshop of the Human Rights Initiative, June 23-26, 1995.
*2* "Japan's Nice New Nationalism," Economist, January 14, 1995, p. 13.
*3* Isaiah Berlin, Four Essays on Liberty (Oxford: Oxford university Press, 1969), p. xl. Even as far as the idea of democracy itself is concerned,as Benjamin Schwartz notes, "in China, the model of the natural and sacred hierarchy of the patrilear family may have lenbt its own coloration to the concepts of hierarchy and authority, but we must again remember that even in the history of the West, with its memories of Athenian democracy, the notion that democracy cannot be implemented in large territorial states requiring highly centralized power remained accepted wisdom as late as Montesquieu and Rousseau." ( The World of Thought in Ancient China [Cambridge: Harvard university Press, 1985], 69).

A Social Contract of "Asian Values".

We've all heard of many things related to the much cherished and lauded "Asian Values".
But just what is it really?
Is our "social contract" also part of this value system?
Is there any system at all to these cherished values in the first place?

As I listened to Pak Lah make his winding up address, I wondered if this much touted phrase "Pantang dicabar" is very much part of this social contract or Asian Values ....

What does "pantang dicabar" actually mean?
Does it meant to "stifle & suppress the challenge", or is it supposed to mean "rising to the challenge"?

From my knowledge of Bahasa Melayu (Bahasa Malaysia, Nusantara, Pilihanraya or whatever you call it), it is supposed to be the latter.
Judging from the way our "Asian Values" and "Social Contract" (whatever they mean) are put to practice, it appears that the former is preferred by the ruling elite in most Asian and third world nations.

In fact, it is this very same political spin that every repressive regime in the world uses, to justify their actions, albeit, for peace, security and prosperity of the nation.

These values become manifest in various forms - it may be Islamic/ Syariah law, Confucianism, Communism, Socialism, ISA, Military rule etc, etc.
Whatever the "philosophy" that is apparently held dear by these authoritarian regimes, they all subscibe to the idea of "pantang dicabar" which means "do not question the order of the day"!
Most, if not all, practice a democracy that is "guided" by those "in the know" for the good of the ignorant masses/ proletariat.
They have got it all figured out, and it should never change - period!
The people are generally held in an ideological stranglehold, and to deviate is to be anti-social, unpatriotic and a danger to society, if not "treasonous".

However all is fine and dandy, should there be fraud, corruption, wholesale money laundering, immorality and cultural decadence on the part of the political elite.
Hey - it was their plan after all, and you are supposed to thank God (and them) that you have crumbs to chew on ........

This is what Asian Values stand for today.

The much lauded and dearly held "Asian Values", is nothing but an excuse for the political elite of these "philosophically primitive" despots to tighten their grip on power, and to rule over the masses.
It is almost the same reasonings used by many an authoritarian parent, to impose their will upon children.

Such is the disdain that the political elite with "Asian values" hold, for freedom of opinion, speech, information and public opinion.
The public do not deserve to hear or see the truth - they should be told at all times that all is well, and that the "wise ones" never make mistakes.
The stifling of the media, show of power and a diet of lies, in their opinion is the only thing that can pacify a restive people.
It is best that they are kept ignorant, pampered and lazy, so as to perpetuate their mental slavery, for the benefit of the ruling class.

The public who pay their taxes are not worthy enough to ask questions - to question authority is a "Pantang" in Asian Values.

To indulge in an intellectual discourse is "Pantang".
To demand accountability is "Pantang".
To demand free and fair elections is "Pantang".
To engage in an open discussion and debate with the people having opposing ideas, is a "pantang".
Free debate/ discussion of philosophical/ socio-political ideas is but the greatest "pantang" of them all. To do so would incur the wrath of the "thought police" of the wise ones, who are ordained by God to rule.

"Asian Values", thrive on "Pantangs" imposed upon the citizens in the guise of democracy.
"Pantang" is the name of the game!

It is therefore no surprise that most Asian, African, South American and Eastern European regimes who espouse these "Asian Values" form the bulk of the third-world and poor of the world.

How I wish "Pantang DiCabar" meant "Rising To the Challenge" rather than the "Suppression and Repression of Challenges".
The world could probably be a much better place without these apparently great "Asian Values" ......

TRIBUTE TO BERSIH AND MARCHERS

I LOVE ALL YOU GUYS WHO STOOD UP FOR RIGHTEOUSNESS.


TO ALL BRAVEHEARTS OF MALAYSIA - MY SALUTES!


Thank You BERSIH, DSAI, Tuan Hj Hadi, PSM, SNAP!

Take a look at this video, made for the occassion.

Rave reviews - Shocking & Spanking the Monkey

Feel free to enjoy the song "Shock the Monkey" from the album "When Pigs Fly" (different versions), while you read. Thank You.

• Warning: The following article has been classified by the Koreksia National Censor Board - 18.PG.SX

The recent winding-up speech at the United Communist Notional(sic!) Organ orgy, has drawn rave reviews in the "grate" media - newspapers, television, radio, magazines, tabloids, paparazzi, and what not were all hysterical in their praises- except for one irritating group - the "loggers".

These "loggers" seem to be able to chop down every imaginable "parasitic, twisted idea" that the "Grate Lidder" plants.

Since they aren't too supportive of UCNO fetishes, we shall refrain from using their ammunitions against the "great, beloved, humble and pious leader" of the grate party. We'll deal with them one way or other ....... ehem!

(Yeah man! It was a great lively party - with lots of back-slapping, spanking , stabbing, kinky kissing fetishes and hot chicks too!)

It has to be highlighted that many delegates displayed fetishes of BDSM, ie self-flagellation, Long hard and sharp objects, and as the poetic Deputy Grate Lidder put it, the "honorable" tips of the tongue, "Linggam"(aka “anunya”), Dagger and Bananas. (Speaking of bananas, the monkeys in the background were always fed peanuts only, as seen on the TV screens).

It was indeed a very satisfying event for all monkeys, especially for the Grate Lidder who appeared to be on ALD (aka amphetamine-like drugs, "speed", ecstacy) when his hoarse faltering voice was raised intermittently, to magnify his "firmness" on issues of the day, namely about addictions to cost-efficient labour, subsidies, subtle taxation of the middle class, “ the understandable suppression of 'our friends', stability and parliamentary dumbocracy”.

For those who are ignorant, Please take note that Delegates will be respectfully addressed as Gros. (short for the esteemed title "Granpa of Shiners" that is given for their "servicing" the tools of the "Grate Lidder"). If the title were translated to Bahasa Melayu .... no Malaysia ..... mmmm Melayu ...... - aaah, to hell with it - you know what I mean, right?

The following are the anticipated responses from the footstools of "The Grate Lidder" of Koreksia.

I regret to say that I was not permitted at the venue, as I did not posses such

impeccable reputations, fetishes, heritage and "beliefs". These interviews were downloaded from the UCNO website.

So, here it goes .......

Gros KataNothing:
"It was an extremely progressive winding-up speech by the Grate Lidder -

I could feel it in the depths my loins.

The fragrance of his flatulence was intoxicating, to say the least.

I've come here a couple of times before, but this time was the ultimate feeling. It was

Hot.
It aroused such passions among the participants, that they all stood up in standing ovulation ..... err, sorry - I meant standing ovation.
Anyway, I'm quite certain that it is obvious to all that the great leader has spent sleepless nights to articulate his passions and love for duty.
All in all, the people should be very proud that we have a man with such dedication to the satisfying climax of the party, and the country as a hole (sic)."

Gros Toupee Value:
" .... I need another stiff one - thank you. (a drink later ....)

As I was saying - it was the very spirit of mutual understanding and dependence that we have succeeded in enriching everybody. We should never question the contract - by the way, you must be aware that we never signed the contract, and so whatever said and done, it is always legal and correct.
Nobody makes mistakes around here .... The Grate Lidder has warned those who questioned the unsigned "contract", and also those who waved their weapons provocatively, as it could frighten the ladies.
He reassured them that the weapon was meant to protect them and not to rape them, as did the pedophiles of late. The Pedophiles and Elopers of UCNO never do such things -

I trust them with my @$$.

As for me, I'm mighty proud that they have offered to protect my black @$$ with their tools of trade, while I have the other smalltime @$$es under mine.
So we can rest @$$ured that the great leader has our @$$es covered - the burial has been delayed, though ..... I'll check if the project has been canceled."

Gros Sukun:
"What you see is an extreme expression of commitment to the people who hunger for a great nation.

It was this amazing unsigned contract that has made all of us rich - when I say us, I mean the country as a Hole.
The Grate Lidder has assured us that all sectors of society will be penetrated, with the available protection of the instruments on display here - the dedication was illustrated and sealed with a kiss. Did you see the spit spraying and mouths frothing? Those are hallmarks of passion, commitment and dedication!
What more could a man .... or woman ask for, huh?
I'm so elated, with such a climax to the hole event."

Gros Prin KaTingan:
The Grate Lidder has renewed his pledge towards

development in the land above the storm.
We don't entertain nonsensical issues about aliens landing on our shores - these were all delusions and lies spread by the "loggers" community.
We have sent a man to space to reassure the people that aliens don't exist. We've even

acquired some submarines to make sure they don't exist in our seas - never mind the fact that some aliens were bombed to smithereens in the process.

In the spirit of space travel, our Deputy Grate Lidder has even coined the phrase, "spaced-out race" - but it sounds better in Bahasa Melayu .... I mean Malaysia ... heh .... heh. The deputy has made it his motto in life to make sure we have a "spaced-out race".
This in memory of our achievements and sacrifices towards taking the people towards greater heights of comfort, using the organs and instruments displayed, with plenty of tender loving care and kisses.
We should never question the use of the Tongkat as the symbol of support for the "spaced-out race". Just don't underestimate the Tongkat - we'll make sure we shove it where the sun don't shine, just like what was done when I did .... ha, hah!

One other notable comment was from Gros SIL-ly - he said that all patriots aka rempits on "kapcais" should continue to get subsidized petrol even after the price has gone up, subsidies removed and Petrobras company has gone bust. According to Gros SIL-ly, "... it is only when we have these patriot on kapcais, can we achieve "spaced-out race" targets! Who else would monkey around our streets to entertain the tourists and showcase our achievements?".

In conclusion I would like to add that many more deserving accolades were dished out to the Grate Lidder, by luminaries such as Gros Badut-din, Gros Mm, Gros KUS (that's the Pariah Party Pooper who was told to get out, but having a fetish for

humiliation, sat through it all), and Gros Kissamudin (who could put the rock band KISS to shame).

Thank Goodness for ALDs, all participants took an active part in the event by laughing at SIL-ly Goblok Banana jokes.

Lastly, whatever their fetishes may be, the sad part of it all is the fact that, good or bad, racist or not, they (UCNO) are the only ones who seem to be having an agenda and methodology, in an environment that has most others “grate leaders” of other parties dancing to the tune of sectarian monkey politics.

I hear someone singing & gloating - "We are the Champions ......"

Quite a Catch-22 situation for the critics .......

Disclaimer: The above is a political parody and purely a figment of a vulgar imagination, equivalent to the fetish of kissing of sharp metal objects in public. All ideas have not been fully thought through. Any likeness to anyone dead or alive is purely coincidental. The writer is willing to withdraw any statement that might be deemed insulting, with apologies.