Tuesday, 21 December 2010

Sarawak’s billion dolar bride! « The People’s Parliament

Sarawak’s billion dolar bride!

December 21, 2010

Received the following alert :

Sarawak Report has been subjected to a cyber-attack, which has knocked it temporarily off-line. This follows a number of death threats sent through our mail, which have been notable for their creepy, ‘black-magic’ format.

Disabling websites by using millions of hits is a very expensive process, even more expensive than hiring top lawyers. So this limits our list of suspects in this case to people who are both very rich and have a direct interest in shutting us up, but who would rather not face the scrutiny of an open court.


In solidarity with Sarawak Report, which has done so much for the people of Sarawak in the short time that it has made its mark in blogosphere, I am posting the Sarawak Report that would have been posted up but for this cyber-attack.


Billion Dollar Bride

Meanwhile, we have exclusive pictures of Sarawak Chief Minister, Taib Mahmud’s, new young bride. Kuching has been aflame with interest and amusement at the leaked information that the 74 year old has found himself a second wife who is still in her 20s.

However, the government has refused to issue official confirmation of the wedding ceremony that was celebrated at the weekend in the Chief Minister’s vast mansion (the financing of which remains a mystery, like the rest of his properties). Even senior Government Ministers are scouring the web for details of the new “Thief Lady”, who has yet even to be announced by name.

In desperation calls have been made to Sarawak Report and so we feel honoured to oblige.

Sarawak’s wealth around her neck

Sarawakians will not fail to notice that several thousand hectares of irreplaceable jungle must have been felled and turned to oil palm to adorn this lady’s neck.

One top London jeweller today gave the opinion that the rubies in her diamond tiara, necklace, ring and broach are “likely to be fake glass”. His reason was that if they were genuine cabochon rubies, like they appear to be, then they would be “priceless at such a size as that”. When pressed the jeweller hazarded that they would be worth at least RM150 million.

Since the Chief Minister has yet to release details about his bride we will leave Sarawakians to decide amongst themselves whether the Chief Minister has adorned his new wife in glass or cabochon ruby.

Christmas is a time for sharing

As they depart for their Christmas honeymoon, doubtless utilising one of the Hornbill jets funded by Sarawak’s hard-pressed taxpayers, we hope the happy couple spare a thought for the many hungry children in the longhouses who are hoping for a nice present this year.

However, times are hard because more and more land has been snatched away from these communities by the Chief Minister’s BN government, so their parents will have already told them not to expect too much.

As ever, these parents will have to remind their children that the Chief Minister’s favourite advice to the rural folks is that they “must learn to wait”. Apparently, Taib is promising that at some stage he will begin to share his wealth with the people he took it from!

Posted by Haris Ibrahim
Filed in Sarawak State Elections, Taib Must Go


  1. How many 74 years old man have the chance of having a Beautiful BRIDE in her 20's to share his bed?

    Obviously his Good Luck or his CHARM?

    Anyway, congratulations to CM Taib. May his Health permit his to have many years of wedded BLISS.

  2. I seriously doubt it was his charm or good luck.
    It must have been her love for the Sarawakians (for giving up so much of their natural resources- to be hung around her neck) which made her want to care for their beloved leader, right?

    Poor woman- she really stuck her neck out for them (rubies)....


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